Seeing as though the only reason I write here nowadays is to provide ventilation for my most intimate irritations, I thought I'd treat you all. No, not more turt pics (the buggers won't stay still long enough now), not more Total Crashing Malady, nor will I submit a video to YouTube of me gargling the words to Gay Bar through a strawberry milkshake (best not to ask).
Instead here's a list of Teenyversal truths. Mainly because I forgot to do this upon turning 19, and was reminded of this fact by Sprog.
~ Girls of a certain age (i.e. mine) are generally one of three categories: they act dirty, they talk dirty, or they play dirty. I'm not telling you which one I am either.
~ Film or TV series that were good ten years ago will now be 'modernised'. Note: for 'modernised', read 'daft'. Cough, Indiana Jones. Just because Lucas is obsessed with space, it doesn't mean Harrison Ford should suffer.
~ Radio One's Live Lounge is possibly the biggest music pioneer of the moment. Although ideally not the best place to go if you think the idea of Daniel Bedingfield covering The Killers is a stupid one.
~ Young girls should learn to sing and not to just talk along to a tune. Yes, I do like the music, but I expect that in a few years time it'll be out of fashion.
~ If you're going to go out with a co-worker, co-habitant or co-caine addict (note: the last one's a joke), make sure that they're your other half beforehand. That way you have a slight get-out clause if you need it.
So there you have it.
Teeny - "No matter how hard you pray or how much you beg, you will never get back the two hours you wasted watching Nicholas Cage's The Wicker Man"
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